grassroots campaigns Inc

Tired of discussions about whether progressive campaigns are "working" or not? Worn out from the protests of would-be progressive activists who feel like their commitment has been disrespected and soured? Exhausted by the effort of having to respond to each new argument carefully and with consideration for what could be done better?

We can help!

We'll teach you how to suppress discussion of campaign mismanagement in eight easy steps. Soon suppressing discussion will be so easy, you'll never again have to actually think about the way your campaigns are run!

Especially designed for your online needs!

Maybe you're experienced in this sort of thing through face-to-face arguments. (You probably know, then, how easy it is to deal with such a situation: question your opponent's commitment to the cause, say "I just don't think you're a good fit for this campaign," and get them outta there!) Maybe you're new to the online world, and baffled by this chaotic new medium. This guide is just for you! Whether you're a baby troll or an experienced flame warrior, we can teach the best way to make your online environment a safe, friendly, hierarchically-stable place. Soon the World Wide Web will be your home away from home — and like your home, the people who run your campaigns will be totally unaccountable for their actions!

It's easy!

Just follow the steps below in order.